scaredy-kad

I am scared to death of being home alone at night. Why? Because I am completely addicted to any kind of crime scene/investigative television show.

I religiously watch NCIS, Cold Case, and CSI (thanks to my genius producer of a cousin, Hi Allen!), and I am fairly confident that I have seen every episode of all Law and Order series; this includes the Original, SVU, and Criminal Intent (sick, I know). A special long weekend Law and Order Marathon? Sure! A Full Saturday dedicated Law and Order? Don’t mind if I do!

While my obsession serves as a form of entertainment when I am with other people, it quickly shifts to an origin of paranoia when I am alone. Instead of being realistic (the chances of my house being robbed while alone isn’t any higher than if someone was with me), I choose to worry about every possible thing that could go wrong. Insert acute paranoia here.

An educated solution would be for me to stop watching said crime scene/investigative television shows, which not only spark my very creative and elaborate imagination, but also no doubt serve as the route of all my safety illusions. Clearly this is not an option for me, as I would rather lay in bed paranoid until I fall asleep every night, instead of give up CSI On Demand.

My [not so] educated solution? Lock the doors, set the alarm, open interior doors to block views of lurking prowlers, set booby traps, sleep with two phones (both hard line and cell phone), hide a knife near my bed, and lay very still if I hear a peculiar noise. I wish I was kidding. Oddly enough, when I am sleeping in my apartment, I only feel it necessary to set traps, leave a light on, and lay still upon odd noises. Intuitive, I know.

This has been a developing trend over the years, but particularly in the past few months. I find that recently I have knowingly been doing things that I will regret later. Example? Well, besides my self-objection to televised guts/gore and body mutilations which will later turn to back-of-mind thoughts, I have also been eating ice cream. This may seem innocent, but it is not. I am a lack-tard.

I find this whole situation to be rather ironic. Why? As I write this, I am watching NCIS while eating ice cream. She will never learn (but props for the multi-tasking.)