RIP Vienna and Jake.

This just in.

Vienna and Jake have split up. Is anyone surprised? Doubtful.

Jake, here is one big, fat “We told you so” from the entirety of your female audience.

Lets compare, shall we?

Meet Tenley, the dancer gone college FIDM Admissions Director. When Tenley isn’t too busy being an admissions director of one of the most prestigious design schools in the country, she enjoys dancing and playing with puppies (okay, I made that last one up, but I mean she definitely likes playing with puppies.)

Biggest flaw? She speaks like she is straight out of a Disney movie, and doesn’t have a day that doesn’t include pillow fights, rainbows, feathers, lollipops and other happy, pretty things (I mean, that has got to get annoying sometime, right?)

Meet Vienna, the college sorostitute gone, well, white trash. Prior to the show, Vienna resided in the FLA, where she lived with her [seemingly creepy and partially incestual] father and newly purchased boobs [paid for by her deployed ex…welcome home, hunny!]

Biggest flaw? Um, do I have to pick just one?

So Jake, who do you pick to spend the rest of your life with? The 26-year-old Disney Princess who has never sworn in her life and is looking for true love and a family, or the 23-year-old up and coming actress/“Oh, you may have seen me on ‘Girls Gone Wild: Season 2’ ”/model, who is still looking to model for Playboy?

Good choice Jake, I definitely would have chosen Vienna too, dink.

Jake will join his other 13 Bachelor gone-wrong colleagues, who also haven’t been able to stay with the “soul mates” they found while on the show. Meanwhile, Trista, the first bachelorette, is still happily married to the heartthrob she chose many years ago.